I started having infusions last week. I wanted to write a little bit about that this morning (yes, as I sit here while saline is being pumped into my dehydrated body).
A few weeks ago, I called my cardiologist in a panic. Immediately received a call back that we would be started infusions. So last Friday, I begun this little road of infusions.
Now truthfully, I had a mixture of emotions – in terms of receiving infusions. See, I have what is called Interstitial Cystitis. When I received an antibiotic infusion around Easter last year, I received with it – unbearable bladder and pelvic floor pain. It was the most horrific pain I have ever endured. Needless to say, I attributed it to infusions in general and decided “never again”.
Never again, didn’t exactly last as long as I thought it would.
* * * * *
Faith: The Driving Force
Because I place my faith in Jesus Christ (and not my circumstances), I felt led to give it another go. So, my first infusion was on Friday (2/12/16). The infusion itself went great. It wasn’t anything like that horrible experience a year ago. My pain from IC was minimal.
One of my concerns wasn’t solely the infusion. It was the environment. I became concerned with how my anxiety would hold up. Anxiety is a common symptom of a number of health issues. But, it is a common occurance when it comes to POTS, not sure how my body will hold up, or being in a crowded room.
God calmed my fears, the moment I stepped into the infusion center. It was not crowded like last time. There were very few people present to receive their infusions the same time as mine. It was such a tremendous blessing for me to receive, as I take this step of faith to begin receiving this infusion to help stabilize my blood pressure, heart rate, and blood volume.
Concern #2 (and the comforts God provides)
Another concern I had was time. How do I fill the gaps of time, without becoming frustrated at the thought of sitting still while the saline is being infused into my body? I brought plenty of things to keep me occuppied. Check out the list –
- Laptop and charger
- Two smart phones charged up
- Bible Study (which right now is – the Armor of God Bible Study by Priscilla Shirer)
If the list sounds obsessive, you aren’t alone. I know, I bring a lot of stuff. I look around me at this moment, and most people bring solely their cell phones, headphones, and/or someone with them. Since I have to come alone and am naturally a writer, I know how to best occupy the time. But, each infusion is an opportunity to know God does provide for me during this scary time of beginning infusions.
Every time I go for my infusion, it continues to solidify my trust in Jesus Christ and to recognize Him as my true Provider!
I occupy the time, by sitting and writing. Which is what I am doing today. Today, I am armed with my laptop, charger, and headphones (along with my data-filled cell phone).
Today, nearly a week later, I am having my second infusion. We had some “problems” getting the IV started up. But, it is going. My IV has probably about 10-15 minutes left. Which isn’t bad considering it took us about 30 minutes and 4 tries to get an IV line going.
I made a mistake today.
I was too tired to get up to hydrate beforehand.
You know with POTS, it just happens!
Add in IC, what’s left to explain?
But thank God, they didn’t ask. They didn’t say a mean remark. There was no shaming (other than what little bit I poured on myself). There was just grace. They kept trying. They listened when I expressed my concern about not wanting to utilize my left arm (left-handed). I love how loving and gracious the staff is with me.
As I reflected on their love and grace, I know they appreciate the simple fact of experiencing it themselves. I stayed loving and gracious to them. Today was just one of those filled with moments where I had to decide what my response would be.
Making The Decision
This morning, I just couldn’t get up and go. I was just too exhausted. I would wake up to do something or answer my phone, then immediately went back to sleep. If I hadn’t made this appointment, I might even of cancelled. But, I didn’t. I got up. I got dressed.
And, I got up the courage to come.
One of the things that made today rougher was – due to how tired I was, I let myself get dehydrated in the process.
Making today’s saline infusion even more needed.
No matter how much they tried, they just couldn’t get the IV started. They tried my preferred arm for IV’s, and it just wouldn’t work. After three tries, my options were clear. Either spend more time here than one would prefer using a baby needle. Or, offer up my dominant arm for them to use, for the good vein. I opted for the latter.
I made the decision to not complain. Whereas others would stand ready to complain, I had no desire to complain. I decided I wanted to choose joy. Choosing joy…
Choosing Joy Instead
I spend a lot of time reading Rachel‘s encouragement on a variety of social media fixtures. So, it is today to choose joy. I chose joy today. I chose joy over complaining. I chose joy over criticism. Simply put, I chose joy.
Choosing Joy Today!
In life, we will encounter situations that are far beyond our control and preferences. But, we can still choose joy.
I chose joy today, and wanted to glorify God in the midst of my circumstances. I was thanked for my patience. My IV infusion went well.
In the midst of an infusion, I was able to offer other things – joy, grace, and my time to worship my great Savior! Isn’t that what all things in our lives should do? Glorify God?
“Be thankful in all circumstances, for
this is God’s will for you who belong to
Christ Jesus (1 Thess. 5:18, NLT).”